As I child I would not speak
So hesitant were my words
So painful was my heart
To say what I wanted
And needed from those
Who should have heard
– words I could not say
Later I learned to speak
Without my heart
To those who could hear
Only what they wanted
And then forget
What I said except
– when it pleased them
Sometimes I hear
A voice that I don’t
Recognize as mine
And wonder
Who is speaking
And who is listening only
– hoping it was you
Should I hesitate as I speak
Please don’t think me preoccupied
For words don’t come easily when
When one really cares
And too often I evaluate each word
Trying to be anyone
– but myself
And the fear of rejection
Brings confusion
And confusion brings silence
And my heart prays
That you might hear my silence
– and understand